H Street NE


May “H-Street” the Sitcom be Just as Creative

Flickr: Kate Mereand

Next week on H-Street, Mitch and his bowtie take in the Palace of Wonders, where the fire breathers inspire him to get heated!

On Monday, Elahe posted about about an open casting call for a new, local, low-budget television show, which is named after its setting: “H-Street”.

The roles include some male and female characters in their 20s who are all D.C.-transplants. Some are out to save the world, others work on the Hill, and others are completely oblivious of politics and play kickball (!).

And one wears a bowtie while being abrasive! The City Paper is having some fun with this “news”:

Yes, the producers of H Street should be very publicly shamed for concocting such lazy stereotypes. Still, if they must go ahead with their show—and really, only if they must—we hope the first few episodes look something like this…

“Brad, late for his Ultimate game and straddling his Bianchi Pista, sends himself flying when his bike gets caught in streetcar tracks. His roommate Cammy, in a rare day off from phone-banking, helps him to the hospital, where he learns a valuable lesson about universal health care. He’s discharged, only to end up back in the emergency room after falling ill during a kickball game. He learns he has a rubber allergy, and despondent, heads to Charles’ bar, which, being packed with guilt-struck kickballers, is quickly destroyed by gentrification.”

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H Street NE Sitcom Casting Black Burglar But No Hipsters

Flickr: Daquella Manera

Which side of H Street NE will we see in this new sitcom?

Frozen Tropics alerted us to this open casting call for a sitcom called H-Street, set in the H Street NE corridor. Get ready for some serious plots involving race, gentrification and clashes over streetcars!

Hm, or maybe not so much.

The roles include some male and female characters in their 20s who are all D.C.-transplants. Some are out to save the world, others work on the Hill, and others are completely oblivious of politics and play kickball (!).

No race is specified for those roles, but it is specified for two other characters: a black burglar (really?) who is to be in his late teens or early 20s and can “pull off a terrible British accent” (no idea where that is going), and Charles, a D.C. native who runs a “clean, efficient” bar on H Street NE and is “annoyed by hipsters.” Notably missing is a casting call for said hipsters.

It’s not exactly clear who is behind this self-described low budget, independent project, but we will be watching with baited breath.

Wonkette on H Street

Flickr: thecourtyard

H Street NE

Wonkette reviews Smith Commons restaurant, thinks H Street is a “Mainstream Urban Oasis”, and deems it our version of an “Epcot-like recreation of Brooklyn”:

Smith Commons is a fine establishment on H Street and just because it’s not overwhelmingly cartoon-y, it doesn’t mean that the area is losing its charm. Or maybe this Gentrification Part Two of the area is exactly what this means! We do not know these things. The New York Times hasn’t written a profile of H Street NE in years, probably because they’re too afraid to venture to the Northeast quadrant, so we guess we’ll never know. Oh well. We would just like some streetcars, please. The END.

Like Paul Masson wine, there will be no gray lady profile of a “hip” D.C. nabe, before its time.

The Hate Graffiti that wasn’t.


Lorax tattoo by Paul Roe, British Ink

Yesterday, I went to Metro Mutts on H Street NE to find out more about the hateful graffiti which some vandal had spray painted on “their” door this weekend. I was surprised to discover two things:

- Metro Mutts has never encountered any negativity or hostility before this

- Metro Mutts shares the vandalized door with upstairs neighbor, British Ink.

In fact, the “door” which was tagged is really an outer door which doesn’t even have the six-month old pet shop’s name on it yet– there is merely a round, Metro Mutts sticker. It seems inaccurate to declare that Metro Mutts was the target of racist, anti-Gay, anti-gentrification graffiti but the mistake is wholly understandable; the first floor store front belongs to them. Anna Collins, one of the co-owners of the cleanest pet store I’ve ever been to, said that she didn’t think the ugly message was aimed at Metro Mutts– and that I should speak to Paul Roe, of British Ink about the incident. I did, this morning, for an hour.

Roe’s unique, by-appointment-only, couture tattoo studio has been open for four years. I asked him why he chose H Street.

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Was Metro Mutts the target of hate graffiti?

Window at Metro Mutts

Yesterday, TBD, Prince of Petworth and Frozen Tropics all reported that Metro Mutts, a pet store on H Street NE, had been vandalized with hateful, racist graffiti. Someone spray painted the following on their door:

“Cracker (large penis illustration) get out my city fag”

Since this unfortunate incident involves race, class and gentrification in the District, I wanted to learn more about what I had read, so last night I took my puppy to H Street to visit Metro Mutts and talk to Anna Collins, who has a fantastic name; she is one of the six-month old store’s owners.

Collins said that the door had been vandalized on Saturday night, after Metro Mutts closed at 6pm but before a regular customer walked by and spotted the graffiti at 9. She expressed some surprise at the gay slur since Metro Mutts is “primarily a woman-run business”– they do have one male partner, but he’s not in the store that often. Collins confirmed that the police had taken their complaint and then sent someone who investigates hate crimes (possibly someone from the GLLU).

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