Part of the conundrum in even highlighting the fear you have about your mother’s mistake is that to many who won’t fault her for it, it seems like an absurd worry, because they would never to jump to any conclusions–and they’ve much more rarely , possibly never, had to experience someone jumping to such conclusions about them or theirs. But as you told Liz, of course, some people may ‘assume something totally different’. You and I know, from our lived experience, that every now and then some people do make such assumptions. After a lifetime encountering people who do jump to conclusions, and enduring the ensuing nasty judgements, it’s easy to get pretty stressed out about it, and yet how to ask the first group of people to understand what that’s like? How to request the empathetic leap to less snark and more warmth? It’s difficult, especially when everyone has the stock response ready. “How very PC of you” has got to be the most unoriginal, common, mindless comment on a post about race, ethnicity and immigration. Basically a robot could say that about any attempt to examine identity and empathy. ‘Don’t be PC’ is essentially shorthand for, ‘don’t make me question my ability to empathetically shift perspective or lack thereof.’
But I know what you mean about the competing feelings: menu mispellings can be really funny and also irritating, b/c proofreading seems like such an obvious step, and yet there’s something also very sad about making fun of them and the social isolation they seem to indicate. And yet, it feels so patronizing to offer help. Actually, though, it’s probably a business opportunity: a consultation service aimed specifically at ESL and immigrant restauranteurs, providing specific tips on integrating regional dining conventions with your own unique offerings. Surely there’s an entrepreneurial cuisine-oriented polyglot (get it?) out there who wants to create some jobs?
]]>If you’re referring to my moment of menu-inspired immigrant solidarity, it was motivated by compassion vs. any type of “correctness”. Thank you for commenting!
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